Porn Star Martini or a Prosecco?


Jane Kroese, Account Director at KISS, writes: On a recent work social, I spotted a colleague supping a delectable looking cocktail…accompanied by a shot of Prosecco. Too tempting to resist. On further investigation (to use the technical term: sampling) I discovered this delight was called a Porn Star Martini.

Who'd have guessed? Gorgeous drink - but I don't fancy rocking up to a bar and ordering a 'Hugh Heffner special' instead of a classic glass of fizz. I loathe the name. I hate everything it represents. It sounds cheap. It sounds nasty. And if I hadn't 'stumbled' across it, I'd never have even tried it simply because of the name.

Never underestimate the impact of a name. Your company, product or service might be phenomenal but you've failed at the first hurdle if the name's a big turn off, alienates your target audience and doesn't convey the right tone and message. Relying on word of mouth just won't cut it - it might work for the short-term thrill of a cocktail, but in the big wide world it won't. You cannot just rely on the thrill of discovery - you've got to make a solid, memorable first impression with your name. It carries a lot of weight and can mark the difference between success and failure.

At KISS, we're in the business of brand experience and we understand how well tailored brand expression has a significant impact on business success. Building a brand can take years and the first thing people encounter from that brand will either be the name or the logo. Names and brands are how your audience can connect - they tell a story and over time help to build emotional engagement.

When you're starting out and thinking about naming your product, organisation or brand there will be many aspects to cover but a few of your absolute essentials are:

  1. Research it, google it, check it out, check it translates to other languages with no hidden meaning. Apple raised a few eyebrows in Japan when Siri was first announced.
  2. What are your competitors named? You don't want any clashes or comparisons
  3. Make sure it's future-proof - what's 'trendy' now might not be in ten years' time, so try to avoid 'trending' themes
  4. Check that it's actually available to use and that there's no patent or copyright on it
  5. Keep it simple - no-one is ever going to get tongue tied with Coca-Cola
  6. Write it down - it may sound great but what does it look like when written down?
  7. Is it descriptive, catchy, or an acronym?
  8. Test it with your target audience -I would have put the brakes on Porn Star Martini from the outset, but if you're going after a different crowd, maybe it's the attention-grabbing name you want
  9. Does it communicate the message you want to convey or imply an emotional connection?
  10. Ensure it's social media proof and won't lead to awkward hashtags - although not an official choice, never forget Ed Sheeran's #sheeranalbumparty!

If you're thinking of working on your name, then consider the KISS cocktail - we can work with you to create a name that registers in the hearts and minds of your audience.

If all else fails, and you need some more inspiration, then check out the ingredients of a Porn Star Martini and you'll find a clever concoction of fresh Passion fruit, Passoa and vodka all chased down with either prosecco or champagne on the side. What's not to love…apart from the name? For anyone interested in trying out this beauty of a cocktail click here for the recipe. Enjoy!



KISS is the creative agency that clarifies the complex.